fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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