My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize