In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
