Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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