in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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