Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
So apparently I’m into choking now
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