This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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