Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
