were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
