I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
