i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
