Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
We had sex on a dog bed..
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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