so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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