So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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