Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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