just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
