i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I wish I only lived at night.
babies were throwing up all over the place
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
