last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
