I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
