maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
