i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
