You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
