I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
