youre lurking in front of me
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
