yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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