My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
