is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
