I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
