before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
