I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
