I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I love you. Go after that dick
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
