Her vagina should come with caution tape.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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