My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
