How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
