Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize