he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
