So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
