My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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