i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Randomize
