She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
