went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
