that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
