Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
