Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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