he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
