There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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