Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
