Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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