I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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