a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
